ladypristine1

The Honest To God Truth

Reality Check!

on January 6, 2014

I’m a strong woman, and I know this , but for some reason I have always allowed the people I love the most to manipulate me into feeling bad for something I may have said or had done even when they are the ones that took it to that point.

 

Let me explain. I am a person that can handle alot, you can yell and scream bloody murder, sometimes i have to admit the yells and screams of another may make me forget why i was mad at them in the first place and i would immediately feel bad for my actions.

The ppl I would lay my life down for are the boldest and they really take my emotions and feelings as a weakness. They go as far as tearing me down, calling me names, playing on my emotions and they have always gotten over, they take that and run with it and me trying not to have someone “mad” I would give in each time, I would take it and deal with it . I would cry later once I was alone but for the most part while nightly i sat there and cried and felt bad about myself even to the point of feeling like i just “didn’t want to be here anymore” 

These people that I loved with my entire heart didn’t care that I was hurting. “Get over it” I have been told by my heart herself. Even she doesn’t feel like my feelings are good enough to care even when she was the cause of “This pain I feel” 

 

My heart, she is my world, everything I do and everything I have done in my life has all been to win her over. My heart never takes blame for what she does, she takes her wrongs and the wrong done to her and she places it to the very back of her thoughts, so far back that she refuses to believe “I did those things, I have never done anything like that to you. Your lying , your just making things up. But even if I did, I wont apologize, I don’t care so GET OVER IT” 

 

The day my heart emotionally left me for dead, abandoned my feelings and said regardless of what i do to you it doesn’t matter you’re stuck with me, Is the day I got my Reality Check. 

 

The choice was mine, at that moment I felt a betrayal from my heart that I had never felt before. My heart turned her back on how I felt. So how could I possibly continue this relationship. Just think if someone tells you that how you feel does not matter, how do you still love your heart after this.. Can you really just bounce back from that? Should you have to?

Some have called me overly sensitive and to those people I say shoot yourself. When there is some random person refusing to care about how you feel it doesn’t I mean what typical person really cares how a stranger feels? But when your HEART that one thats supposed to be protecting your feelings and helping you sort through your feelings flat out tells you that they simply “DONT CARE” and lets not forget just “get over it” without even giving you the chance to say Im hurting. Something is wrong with that. But it has taught me to do just that 

“GET OVER IT” I learned the hard way that no matter how much love you put out there and how much of you you give to others you cant make a person give a damn. No matter how close to them you may be, no matter how you live by treating a person the way you want to be treated theres no guarantee that you will get that same treatment so protect yourself. Protect your love and who you allow yourself to love. Protect your personal business because haters are always looking for a way to show the world that you messed up. 

Be real with yourself because you can be real with everyone you can meet but it doesn’t mean a thing,  most times your heart will betray you and trick you into believing that someone deserves you and belongs in your space and its a setup. YOu know whats best for you, so Use this little tool called “YOUR BRAIN” You see your feelings don’t mean a damn thing to anyone but you. Even your heart betrays you and its supposed to lead  and you follow. But being led by your heart is like being led by a blind horse. YOur dumb ass knew that blind horse would lead you straight into that brick wall , hell you cant yell directions it dont speak english but you hopped your smart ass up there anyhow. Now look , you’re all broken up and most of all your feelings are hurt. But ask yourself does that horse give two shits about YOUR FEELINGS…….

 

 

REAlity CHECK!!!!!!

Advertisements

One response to “Reality Check!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: